Got Hair?

Because only bald guys, or 'Bald Guys', know what other bald guys crave. Spotted this at a local CVS. Comes with a 'light new fragrance' and is 'soft and gentle'. Sounds like a frickin baby wipe. What's the diff anyway? Ah, packaging smackaging. More proof of our dizzyingly arrays of our civilization's patterns of consumption.

No, I am NOT bald. I actually have alot of hair, more than I or anyone else for that matter can handle at times. Even if I was bald, I wouldn't NEED this, would I? Shit. It does say it 'cools as it dries'. I think I should create ass wipes and call them 'Chic Cheek Cloths' or something like that. How much you wanna bet someone will buy them?

These guys are probably making a killing with their cranial wet naps. I don't even want to know what sort of scalp juice gets sopped up with these sissy wipes. Disgusting.